Feast of Saint Yves of Kermartin

Good morning. We see demonstrated in today’s Gospel that humility is about serving another. "When Jesus had washed the disciples’ feet, he said to them:“Amen, amen, I say to you, no slave is greater than his master nor any messenger greater than the one who sent him." In Chapter Seven of the Rule of St. Benedict we are given twelve steps toward being humble and disciplined individuals. I thought it might be beneficial to consider these as we look at marriage:

1.The first step of humility is to cherish at all times the sense of awe with which we should ever turn to God. Awe of God. Keeping in mind God’s laws and being awed by His greatness serves us well to always do what is right where it involves our marital relationship.
2.The second step of humility is not to love having our own way, nor to delight in our own desires. Jesus, in the washing of the feet offers a wonderful example for all married couples of the need to constantly give the gift of self.
3.The third step of humility is to submit oneself out of love of God to obedience. We are called to be respectful and submissive to one another in our marriage for the common good of the relationship.
4.The fourth step of humility is to readily accept in patient and silent endurance any hard and demanding things that may come our way. It is good to accept things as they occur being patient and open to handing things over to God, being mindful that God’s ways are not our ways.
5.The fifth step of humility is that we should humbly confess our sinfulness. It is important to remind ourselves of our own sinfulness and frailty; it goes a long ways toward accepting and understanding the weaknesses of our partner.
6.The sixth step of humility is to accept without complaint hardships that come our way. It is important to constantly be mindful of the need for God’s grace.
7.The seventh step of humility is that we should be ready to speak of ourselves as less important and less worthy than others. We should seize every opportunity to praise and verbally raise up our partner.
8.The eighth step of humility teaches us to do nothing which goes beyond the
rule of the community. It is important to always be mindful of those understood rules which maintain peace and order in the relationship
9.The ninth step of humility leads us to refrain from unnecessary speech. It is important to listen to our partner.
10.The tenth step of humility teaches us not to be given to empty laughter on every least occasion. There is a time and place for everything, and it is important to be mindful of our partner’s sensitivities. Be sensitive.
11.The eleventh degree of humility is concerned with the manner of speech which is appropriate in a monastery. It is important to be gentle and respectful in our speech with each other. Never raise our voice.
12.The twelfth step of humility is concerned with the external impression conveyed by those dedicated to monastic life. Always speak well of our marriage and of each other.

St. Benedict sums up these twelve steps toward humility by suggesting that any monk or nun who has climbed all these steps of humility will come quickly to that love of God which in its fullness casts out all fear and that good habit and delight in virtue will carry them along. In the same way I believe that following these modified steps for marriage will likewise allow for the growth of love in the marriage and will enable a couple to overcome any and all obstacles which might come their way.

Make a great day!

Today we recall the good life, gifts, and works of Saint Yves of Kermartin.